I am so tired. I got really excited that winter was over, but we woke
up to snow this morning!!! It is also suuuuuper windy! It makes riding
a bike in a skirt really challenging. :) Oh well! We had a great week!
This week I really felt like I was guided by the Spirit. Such a
wonderful blessing. A lot of the sisters in our zone are having a hard
time. They called me and I was able to talk with them and (hopefully?)
help them. It was a really special experience to receive impressions
on what to say to them- I know it definitely wasn't anything I could
have helped with. One random prompting was to write a rap for a sister
who was feeling down. I had the impression, and I was like "What? Why
is the Spirit telling me to rap? Rap doesn't come from a very holy
place!" Just for the record, I don't rap. But I did my best, and it
was probably the worst rap ever, but this Shimai said it made her
laugh super hard and totally made her day. NO! I will not send out a
video! The Lord definitely works in mysterious ways. I feel really
blessed to have this calling at this point on my mission because it
keeps me so busy I have no time to think about trunky things! Haha....
Hmmm. Moving on.
A common theme of almost all of the struggling missionaries that I
talk to is that they feel like they are not "successful", or like they
are not doing enough. A lot of times, we read the "Successful
Missionary" in PMG chapter 1 thinking it will make us feel better...
Sometimes, it does, but most of the time, it makes me feel pretty
crappy!
It is no secret that missions are hard! I am so thankful that I have
been blessed with many trials and hard times. To those who are
preparing to go on a mission, I can't give you any advice except DON'T
GIVE UP.
I love this quote:
Elder Jeffery R. Holland "You only get one chance to serve a mission;
it is your responsibility, your duty, to use it to its fullest; to
give every last ounce of energy until you collapse in exhaustion at
the end of it. All the hardships, all the tears, all the hard work
will be looked back upon as the best thing you've ever done, not
because you enjoyed it, not because you baptized everyone, but because
you gave it everything you had, even when you didn't think you could,
and especially when you didn't want to. Live your mission to its
fullest and work harder than you've ever worked before. Let people
know that this is the most important thing in the world to you... Come
out of your mission proud of what you've done, and this experience
will bless the rest of your life."
This week I was being really hard on myself. I kept having thoughts
like "Why am I not fluent in Japanese yet?" "Why am I sometimes still
afraid to talk to people?" "Why can't we find anyone to teach?" "Why
are none of our investigators progressing?" "Why do all my converts go
inactive?" "Why can't I see baptisms in this area?" and so on.
I spent a lot of my prayers asking God why things weren't going the
way I wanted them to. Then I realized that I was being silly and
repented for being so darn prideful! Where is my faith?
I found a lot of comfort in this scripture:
D&C 50:40-42, 44 "Behold, ye are little children and ye cannot bear
all things now; ye must grow in grace and in the knowledge of the
truth. Fear not, little children, for you are mine, and I have
overcome the world, and you are of them that my Father hath given me;
And none of them that my Father hath given me shall be lost...
Wherefore, I am in your midst, and I am the good shepherd, and the
stone of Israel. He that buildeth upon this rock shall never fall."
One of my favorite kotowaza (Japanese proverb) is "senri no michi mo
ippo kara" which I think translates to "The journey of a thousand
miles begins with a single step".
Usually, this first step is a leap of faith. We must grow in grace and
truth! It is okay if we can't bear all things now! The Savior promises
to help us. We will not be lost and we will not fall if we have faith
in Jesus Christ. God does not expect me to be a perfect missionary, He
just wants me to try my best.
We saw an amazing miracle with Miura Yasuko san! She is 91 years old,
and her children and grandchildren have all served missions. The
missionaries have been teaching her for a while, but she keeps getting
dropped. When I first came to this area, she wasn't really
progressing... But as we have worked with her and have been working
with the Spirit to know what t teach her, she has made amazing
progress. She has stopped saying "Wakaranai" which means "I don't
understand". When we taught her this week, she said "I understood that
clearly".
Our lesson on Saturday was one of the coolest miracles I had ever
seen! We came into the lesson planning to teach about the Plan of
Salvation, but then she asked if we could talk about the Godhead. She
was also having a bad health day and she couldn't hear us. Every time
we have a lesson with her, I plead with God to help her hear the
message. Amazingly, she heard and understood. We explained about God,
Jesus Christ, and then the Holy Ghost. We asked if she had any
questions, she said no. We asked what she thought about the lesson,
she said she understood it... And Then she says "So, I think this
means I need to get baptized." We were all shocked, especially her
daughter, who was the joint in the lesson. We decided on a date
together... March 26th, which is her granddaughter's birthday! The
Spirit was so strong in that room.
That night, I had a dream that a man came to me and told me not to
give up on Yasuko- she is finally ready to join her family! I won't
get to see her baptism, but I am confident that someday I will get to
see her again. God is the one who decides who needs to be taught. I
know that the only was to do God's work is to do it His way. We need
to have faith. I am so lucky to be a missionary! I love my mission!
The church is true! God lives! That's all I have time for this week.
Love you!
サンダーズ姉妹より
Sanders Shimai
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